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South Africa: #SiKhathele

Date: 04.14.2024

Written By

Tonya Khoury

Friday is here! There’s your good cheer.

Where to start, well, I suppose I should start with Busi, you know my chom Busi, hey?  Come on man, you know, Busisiwe? Oh wait, I should rather say, “Madam Public Protector”. Now you know who I’m talking about. We heard testimony this week from two reliable witnesses who told us the most shocking stories. If you think your boss is hard work, check this chick Busi out.

One of the testifiers, a woman, had lost her young niece. She referred to her niece as ‘her little sister’ and that when the girl fell ill, it was a major issue for both her and her family. I can relate, many of us can. This woman traveled to her stricken family, anxiously praying for this child to return to health. Before she even left, before she did anything, she wrote to the PP. The PP seemed to be reasonable and understanding and quoted scriptures of how the child would be healed through prayer. The next day the child died. Now, grief-stricken, the woman wrote again to her boss and told her that her niece had passed. The PP’s response, yet again, was a quoted scripture and her condolences. But the next day, our #DevilWearsPrada of a Public “Protector” issued a list of reports that had to be finalised in a day or two, cases that were in various stages of investigation. The PP said that if they weren’t finalised by deadline, the grieving woman would be given a disciplinary hearing. And she duly went ahead with exactly that. If that wasn’t horrific enough, we heard further testimony about a disabled employee called Madiba. Madiba, who was perfectly able to work in the Public Protector’s office and had had an exceptional track record, suffered a stroke under her menace. When Busi was told that he had taken unwell, she immediately sent him a Whatsapp asking for a list of items that needed to be completed. One of which was due on the very same day, literally in hours.  Or she would implement disciplinary proceedings. He passed away. That’s our Busisiwe, our public protector. Madiba’s brother tweeted that the witness’ testimony had broken his heart as he relived the events under the inquiry. These are real stories South Africa. Thankfully, #Concourt told #Mkhwebane where to get off on that appeal to halt impeachment proceedings and they said she must pay costs to boot. The enquiry continues, it’s on every day and Dali Mpofu has become my background noise. It’s my job and its hard work but nothing compared to working for the PP.

I’m Tonya Khoury and you’re about to #ScratchTheSuface with Acumen Media.

#Afriforum lost its case against the #EFF about singing “struggle” song #ShootTheBoer. It appears this “struggle” song now has a colonial English version. After the judgement, the EFF took to the streets and sang their hearts out, in English. They should have tried Afrikaans too. Guys, I’m serious now, do we have time for this nonsense?

I saw COSATU and others call for the “mother of all strikes” – a #NationalShutdown. This was meant to take place on Wednesday, but we all went to work. Why? Because no work, no pay. Doesn’t matter if you work in the PP’s office or not. We all need to feed our families and hey, trade unions and government, “We. Are. Tired. #SiKathele.” A great Zulu word:

Kathele means I’m tired, but not a normal ‘like yawn I’m tired’, it is the kind of tired where you slump your shoulders and grudgingly put one foot in front of another. Just get on with your day. My South Africa #SiKathele.

COSATU, a word please, I think you’ve misread the room. You’ve misunderstood the state of this country, because we don’t care about strikes and politics. Even past, present and future presidents don’t make an impact on our day. We are just getting back into the grind, trying to make a coin while navigating through those horrific #CrimeStats that were released this week. That’s where we are at. #Working, we are hustling or we would be starving. If you want to make noise, please join Twitter and find yourself a set of bots or paid influencers because that’s how the world works now.

Whistleblower #VytjieMentor passed away. She’d been sick for a while and this brave woman never saw an ounce of justice. She told the #StateCapture Inquiry how #Zuma promised her all sorts of underhanded pay off’s for joining his crew. No one cared. I’m sad about #Vytjie. She did try. Thank you, Ms Mentor.

Some of the biggest stories of the week focused on our hospitals. First, we had the #ThembisaHospital CEO, Dr Ashley Mthunzi, deny that he spent half a million rand on #SkinnyJeans. The hospital bought 200 pairs of skinny jeans at R2500,00 per pair. What kind of hospital is this? Now everyone wants to go. R2500 a PAIR? This was exposed by the slain whistleblower #BabitaDeokaran. He flat out denies it. He said it was for stitches, but what does that even mean? Well, to be fair, skinny jeans can be stitched on. #NgiKathele.

Staying with hospitals, #DrPhophiRamathuba didn’t mince her words in a leaked video where she let out a tirade of xenophobic narrative on one Zimbabwean man who sought treatment in a SA public hospital.  She used this opportunity to make it clear that the only reason our health system was failing was because of people like this guy. She didn’t check if he was here in SA illegally, no not at all, she just trampled over him and said #Foreigners are to blame for the state of our country’s healthcare. Eish, #Ngikathele. Really Ngikathele. This story was so big that Zimbabwe’s government offered to pay for the medical bill. But I think everyone missed the point. Our hospitals, whether being burnt down or ordering skinny jeans, are in a shocking state. It’s not foreigners #DrPhophi, it’s your crew. I mean if this guy was illegal, why is he even here? If he is legal then he is entitled to medical treatment, in fact more so. Give him a pair of #skinnyjeans too. He doesn’t deserve to be the subject of a viral tweet by one of the head honchos spewing xenophobic nonsense. #SiKathele!

Another horror story is this oke, #TshwaneMayor, Randall Williams. He and Busi should get together and go bowling. He’s the guy who wanted to push through an unsolicited bid of R26bn to a service provider he had personally handpicked like a tie from a tie rack.

And where’s our Prez, well apparently, he will answer questions on that pesky farm and couch story, however, there will have to be a panel appointed to investigate. Noticing a trend?  #Khatele. Former President #ThaboMbeki used #RitaNdzanga’s funeral to call for the “renewal of the ANC”. How many times shall they renew this ANC? I must say he was feisty our tata Thabo, especially when he said that there is something wrong “with us” when we kill people for municipal positions that feed the relentless greed that has become the ANC’s creed. That people within the party are only there for the cash, that they can recite the creed like great pretenders. #Sikathele

That head of the Lotto resigned as he was headed to a disciplinary hearing for a grand theft of people’s dreams. We don’t want your resignation dude, can we have the money back? Last week, Steenhuisen’s #Roadkill comment about his ex -wife was labeled “reprehensible”, and then the DA’s women network said it was #LockerTalk. Juju said #PaulMashitile is tipped to be President (he gives us a new name each week).  Ace can’t play at the gluttonous card table anymore and he is madder than a crate of rattle snakes, him and #SupraMuhamapelo – watch those two, they are gangster! A whole bunch of insurrectors were arrested again this week, none of which bear the name Zuma. There is no water at all in Nelson Mandela Bay and we just watch, sitting on the dock of the bay, wasting time. The Competition Commission swooped on several insurance companies citing collusion.

What is my favourite story of the week? Well, I’m glad you asked.  The two presidents and their ‘tekkies’.  No, I’m serious, Zuma and Ramaphosa showed off their ‘tekkies’ on social media. The one Prez wears #Bathu and the other (ex) prez wears #Drip. Sounds about right. I wonder which set of shoes is running this country. Just add #SkinnyJeans and we are all on set. Oh wait, I can’t leave without empathizing with my vegan friends, apparently you can’t call it fake chicken anymore, as products were removed from shelves across the country because of labelling. Are you kidding me?  SiKathele.

I’m Tonya Khoury, you’ve left me in stiches and you’ve just scratched the surface with Acumen Media.

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