The first rule about YouTube is ‘Don’t talk about what’s happening in Palestine and Lebanon’. The second rule of YouTube is ‘You do not talk about what is happening in the Gulf and the Middle East’. And the final rule? If this is your first free speech rodeo, ‘You have to fight!’ It sounds like #TylerDurden just entered the script.
I woke up on Sunday morning to find that a corker of a video, which took me and my team two days to put together, resulted in a threatening message from YouTube. The message read like something you’d expect from Mossad. Apparently I will have my entire YouTube account wiped and I will never be allowed access to YouTube again if I … I touched them on their (YouTube) studio that was for sure. But here’s the good news, the video, #NoFortunateSons, is still up on Facebook and Instagram. This would lead me to believe that the first rule of free speech is you have to fight.
Here’s the thing about that video that really irks me about YouTube’s response. Almost all the content was pulled from, no other than, YouTube, and from so-called “credible” news sites like CNN and Sky News. So, to be clear, YouTube censored their own content (which is not their content) because I put my narrative to it. #WorldWar3 and #FortunateSons. I’m Tonya Khoury and I will not be silenced but I must say I’m a little depro.
Let’s keep it local because let’s face it, when you look out at the world, it’s a bit extra out there isn’t it? Hurricanes, wars, human predators that were once household names and far too much censorship on how Bibi called Lebanon the next Gaza. So let’s keep it tame. Five children died from food poisoning; they were our littlies, aged between six and ten, and they died within minutes of each other on Sunday. Tame enough? A total thirty five kids were poisoned and one still remains critical in ICU. I tuned into the press conference where the Presidency addressed the nation, or those listening… Ntshavheni told us that the foreign-owned #SpazaShops in Naledi, Soweto, were to blame. She told us we “couldn’t have our cake and eat it too”? What? Yes she used that analogy. She said it was the nations responsibility to check the validity of the spaza shop’s right to trade. This was a ridiculous statement, the kids are too tiny to be given any responsibility at all and that particular responsibility a fully grown adult couldn’t even manage. The result? Many of the shops were forcibly closed and looted by the community. Yes looted. The vigilantes stole the very food that poisoned their kids.
I was still digesting this story when we heard that seventy matrics were admitted into hospital with food poisoning too. They’re still investigating if that was a spaza shop. I know the answer to this awful set of stories, and so do you. And you know who else knows? #JohnSteenhuisen, he came out this week to say that food scarcity affects over sixty percent of our nation. That’s three out of every five people in our country are struggling to afford to eat. The logical thing is to try to eat cheaper. What is cheaper, cheaper is packed in some back ally surrounded by rats. And if Ratex gets into crates of biscuits / sorghum / chips etc? Well, hey it’s cheap. So is tree bark. We must do better SA. #HungerGames.
Politrix is running around like a scalded cat. #PanyazaLesufi and #FikileMbalula have been in a public spat. I call him #MinisterOfAlles, Mbalula, and it turns out I’m right. Apparently #Razmatazz Mbalula wants to be president! Please no. Cast your mind back a bit, remember #Mbaks Mbalula was running the negotiations with the DA during the time Zille was still partial to an ANC coalition and since then he’s become very aspirational and quite the little dictator. Helen taught him well. Panyaza #Lesufi was called to order for bringing the “ANC into disrepute” early in the week. #Razmatazz #Mbaks #MinisterOfAlles Mbalula issued this official order. We still haven’t worked out what Panyaza did exactly, maybe he criticised the DA? But he had to go to see Cupcake for tea and for now the dirty dishes remain behind closed doors. What Minister #FearFokol Mbalula has forgotten is that the real President is still in the room, and he’s been using him as a pawn throughout the previous one hundred days. The prez said Panyaza did nothing wrong and called Mbalula back into line. I know. Much ado about nothing. Well, unless you listen to Julius who says that Mbaks is being filled with sweet Stellenbosch jam. Only then does the penny drop. But who’s Julius anyway. Guys, I’m grumpy ne? Sorry.
We finally got a new mayor. Brink exited stage right and enter #DrNasiphiMoya from Action SA who is heading up the capital city. She got her ketang so let’s see how quickly she moves water to #Hammanskraal. That’s all we care about, right? Our human rights! Or is it the budget? Getting back to the #EFFPresser and Julius, I was wowed because he has changed his get up; he’s no longer in a branded t-shirt. It seems the emperor has new clothes. For the first time in my career, Julius bored me to tears. There were glaring omissions like #Ndlozi and a #DeputyPresident and even the people on the stage looked bored, tired and weary. One of the journalists asked why the EFF hasn’t stood by clothing manufacturer and aspirational label, #Drip? Drip slid past business rescue straight into liquidation which is highly unusual for such a massive brand. Julius laughed and asked where the EFF should find twenty million from to rescue the failing business? The journalists laughed back. And it fell flat. All very dry.
We heard about the death of #RayMcCauley the head of the #RhemaChurch. We were told what a wonderful man he was. I don’t know much about the fella but it seems his congregation had only accolades for the charismatic church leader. He wasn’t the only big name that passed on this week, gospel singer #SollyMoholo and head of Tata Group #RatanTata all left us.
Remember Rosemary Nomia Ndlovu, the cop that killed her family members one by one for insurance policies to support her gambling debt? Well, there’s another one, another female cop, and she has been killing off her disabled relatives. To date, her body count is as high as six. I think it’s time these insurance companies stopped advertising all day on the teevee (and stop phoning us from dodgy numbers). But some people will always think of some get rich quick way out. Just pop off a couple of your kin if you’re a cop. Not sure what you’ll do if you’re not? Talking of dirty cops, you may remember the botched hijacking where an eleven-year-old girl that was found in the car? It turns out the hijacker is a cop. Yip, I don’t see my mood improving – trigger warning.
Infuriatingly #LongweTwala, murder accused, will not take the stand, but I’m not sure why, maybe because Chicco is his dad? This case is a farce isn’t it? We’re eleven years in and no closer to justice for Senzo. Madam #Mkhwebane didn’t get her ten million from the coffers. How she thought that we’d just hand over ten bar when she was impeached is beyond me, but it’s the kind of entitlement these politicians carry, something to fill the designer luggage while you leave the burden of hard work behind. Take a look at impeached judge and leader of the #MKParty, Hlope. He was squealing about not being allowed to sit in the interviews to appoint SA’s judges. He’s impeached. What bit of that is unclear? He went on to “resign” from the JSC, but how do you resign if you were fired? Asking for a friend, nah I’m asking for myself. Entitled much? And then this: that Middleburg farmer that has been accused of kidnapping, assaulting and murdering two suspected livestock thieves was also caught paying his two co-accused fifty thousand rand each. I hope they swing him from the rafters. They won’t. But I hope. And then we saw mass killings in the #EasternCape again. What on earth is going on along that coastline? It’s out of control. Yeah that mood aint shifting.
There was a massive #Cosatu march across Durban and Bloemfontein. The march was against joblessness and the work crisis we are facing in our country. The government’s answer of R370 isn’t sufficient and now telling us not to buy cheap food during the rising cost of living won’t work either. Nor will saying “You can’t have your cake and eat it”. Who mentioned The Bastille?
And then these two ridiculous stories: a man was arrested in the Cape with two-hundred-thousand-rands worth of outstanding traffic fines. Ya, you can read that again. And then Chris Brown, don’t get me started on #ChrisBrown. A documentary was released two weeks ago called Chris Brown: A History of Violence and here comes this chop to tour South Africa like it was some kind of curtain raiser to his concerts. And as if that wouldn’t make me grumpy, remember the UCT boss, Professor Phakeng? Well, she got hammered on social media when she announced that she has the best seats in the house for the concert. After Twitter raged at her she then had the audacity to say “If you think boycotting this one concert is going to end GBV in South Africa you are delulu [delusional] and unfortunately I can’t help you. The number of people who have bought tickets is enough to secure a political party at least three seats in the National Assembly. That’s what should worry you.” It starts with you Professor. One woman with a strong media presence is enough to start a boycott. Enjoy dancing on the graves of your sisters that night.
I got to stop writing or you may not come back to read the next piece. YouTube stole my mojo. I have a plan though, I’m going to take a couple of weeks off. Throw in some sharks and some bait and lets see what happens?
I’m Tonya Khoury and yeah, ya know. Oh, and about the video for this piece, it will be on Facebook and Instagram on Sunday. It will stay up and Facebook will take my money.